Author: Yassandra
Fandom: Atlantis
Pairing/characters: Jason & Pythagoras
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: Not mine. BBC and Urban Myth Films own them.
Word count: 18969 (This chapter - 3376)
Summary: Jason never asked to be thrust into Atlantis and separated from the world he grew up in. Set adrift in a strange time and place that he doesn't understand, reality bites and bites hard. They say that grief comes in five stages. Fortunately for Jason he has Pythagoras to help him through them.
A story told through a series of conversations between two friends.
A/N Written for round five of the Small Fandoms Bang, and also for Hurt/Comfort Bingo for the 'taking care of somebody' prompt.
Please go and check out the lovely artwork by Gryphon2K here on LJ, or here on AO3, and give the artist some appreciation too :-)
This fic is set throughout the first series - I hope the time frame makes sense.
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The walk back from the Temple had done little to improve Jason’s mood. By the time he reached his own doors he was furious. Damn the woman! Did she have to be so bloody obtuse all the time? This whole destiny thing and her pronouncements of “all will become clear in time” had grown very old very quickly. She had practically told him that she was lying straight to his face but still plainly expected him to trust her implicitly; to follow every word she said.
At the door to the house Jason paused. It wasn’t fully the Oracle’s fault, he admitted to himself with a sigh. She hadn’t brought him here (at least he didn’t think so) and was clearly delighted that he was here – although that in itself raised questions. Jason was honest enough with himself to admit that her attention and pronouncements of how special he was, were more than a little flattering. After all, in his former life he had barely registered on most people’s radar; had been a bit of a loner; an outcast in his way; and certainly never more than average by anyone’s standards. So to be told that he was so special – to be greeted with such obvious delight by a woman who was apparently widely revered in the city – was pretty remarkable; pretty amazing.
It also heaped pressure on him though. To be told that he alone was responsible for the fate of Atlantis and for saving the city and its people was more than a little daunting. How the hell was he supposed to go about saving the city? This was Atlantis for God’s sake! The city that was destined to sink beneath the ocean – and he was supposed to stop that? The Oracle, Jason was very quickly learning, was good with the “to do” lists but less than helpful with the “how to do” lists.
It probably didn’t help that he felt so damned lost too. He knew nothing of this world and its society and now he was dumped in the middle of it and told to get on with saving it? Jason bit his lip. He hadn’t even been able to find a permanent job let alone anything else. How was he supposed to be this big hero that the Oracle kept announcing him to be when he couldn’t even help his friends put bread on the table? The last couple of weeks had been a rollercoaster. Jason had always believed himself to be pretty adaptable to most situations but this… this whole place – the whole situation he found himself in – seemed to morph from wondrous dream to hideous nightmare and back again. He was lost; directionless; rudderless. If it hadn’t been for Pythagoras, he wasn’t sure what he would have done.
Pythagoras had been pretty amazing to be honest; had taken all of (to his eyes) Jason’s weirdness in his stride; had accepted without murmur the (fairly obvious) fact that his friend knew next to nothing about their society and little of their Gods but also did not want to talk about his own past or place of origin. Jason knew (with a guilty twinge) that his mood had been gradually getting worse over the few short weeks he had been in Atlantis. The lack of immediate purpose was getting to him and he found himself growing inexplicably angry at the slightest provocation. Pythagoras had dealt with his moodiness with unruffled calm, lending a sympathetic ear or giving a calming word when it seemed necessary, or slipping a thin arm around his friend’s shoulders when he thought it might be needed (and accepted), or using light and sarcastic banter (mainly at Hercules’ expense) to lift Jason’s mood on a fairly regular basis. It was almost disturbing just how quickly Pythagoras had come to be able to read him, Jason mused, and how deftly the young mathematician could divert him whenever his mind seemed to be wandering down a darker path.
It was odd but in spite of feeling like he was lost at sea a lot of the time, some aspects of Jason’s life actually seemed to be going better than they ever had before. Pythagoras was proving to be probably the best friend he had ever had (and if that made him pathetic then he really didn’t care right now) and even Hercules seemed to be warming up to him. Certainly the big man had made no further suggestions that Jason should leave; had seemed to accept that he was now a permanent member of the household – although quite how that had happened Jason wasn’t quite sure. He wasn’t going to argue though. After all he had no other friends in this strange city and nowhere else to go if the truth be told. Okay so a bed of his own would be nice rather than having to sleep rolled up in blankets on the bare floor, but it was still infinitely better than being tossed out into the gutter.
Yes, Hercules was definitely warming up. He’d even called Jason “my friend” a couple of times (mainly when he was drunk it had to be said but surely that was beside the point). It was probably the encounter with the Minotaur that had done it. Jason had been told that life or death experiences tended to bond men closer together and that certainly seemed to hold true where Hercules was concerned. Thinking of Hercules made Jason’s face darken again though; his temper flaring once more. When Hercules had come home this morning and told them he had arranged a job for them Jason had actually been pleased. He hadn’t minded the idea of helping the burly wrestler one little bit. It had been a distinctly nice thought that he might actually be able to contribute to the household for once.
The truth was that Jason had realised fairly quickly (certainly within the first couple of days here) that there was not a great deal to spare in the small household he had found himself joining. Neither Pythagoras nor Hercules seemed to have a steady or regular job and money was quite clearly scarce (although that didn’t seem to stop Hercules from going out drinking and gambling almost every night). The addition of an extra mouth to feed had stretched their limited resources even further and, although neither of them said anything, Jason was only too aware that his presence was an added complication that they could probably have done without (and damn if that didn’t make him feel extra guilty too).
What he had not been expecting when Hercules had told him about the job, however, was that the big man would turn up very late for his shift on watch; leaving Jason sitting alone in the dark with nothing but his own brooding thoughts for company long past the point where he should have been relieved, growing steadily angrier with every minute that Hercules was overdue. Then when the big man had turned up he had clearly been drinking; was most definitely on the wrong side of drunk. Jason felt his anger surge once more as he stomped into the house, letting the front door bang behind him (although not too noisily in case Pythagoras was already asleep – it was very late after all) and making his moody way out onto the balcony.
Once there, Jason slid to the floor, back against a pillar, head resting back against the wall and hands clenched into loose fists at his side, as his frustration at Hercules, the Oracle and the whole damned world bubbled up through him.
“How did it go?” Pythagoras’ soft voice was startling in the stillness, his tone innocuous.
Jason snorted derisively.
Pythagoras sighed.
“It went that well then,” he murmured, taking in his friend’s tense posture. “You might want this then,” he added, sitting down beside Jason and pouring some wine into one of the cups he had brought with him onto the balcony and pushing it towards his friend.
Jason stared at the cup for a few long moments before grabbing it and taking a large gulp.
“Thanks,” he muttered as he set the cup down again.
Pythagoras picked up his own cup and sipped at it slowly, wriggling himself into a more comfortable position.
“What happened?” he asked. “You are much later than I was expecting.”
“Hercules,” Jason answered shortly.
“Ah,” Pythagoras murmured. “I have been friends with Hercules for many years now but even I would admit that he can be somewhat trying at times. What did he do this time?”
“He was late,” Jason growled. “He left me sitting there for hours… and when he did finally turn up he’d been drinking. His breath stank of wine.”
“Ah,” Pythagoras murmured again. “I should have warned you of that,” he added apologetically.
Jason frowned.
“Warned me about what?” he asked testily.
“Warned you that Hercules will always begin the evening in the tavern if he is undertaking a guard job,” Pythagoras answered. “He is always late and regularly drunk. I have become so used to it that I simply did not think to warn you.” He hesitated. “I must admit to you now that I have been more than a little selfish,” he said.
Jason snorted again.
“You’re the most unselfish person I’ve ever met,” he protested sharply.
Pythagoras smiled.
“It is kind of you to think that,” he replied. “However, in this case I fear that I have been less than altruistic. The truth is that in the past Hercules would call on me to assist him with any of the jobs he arranged no matter how inconvenient it might be or that I might have alternative plans. When he suggested that you might help him this evening and you agreed to it, I was somewhat grateful. My own studies are, I believe, approaching a potentially crucial stage and I was glad to not be called upon to set them aside; to have an evening to myself for once.” Pythagoras hesitated again, flushing as he mentally reviewed what he had just said. “Not that I would not have been glad to spend the evening in your company,” he added hurriedly, apparently worrying that Jason might infer that he did not want him there and take offence. “I did not mean…”
Jason waved away the attempted apology with one curt hand gesture. He drew his knees up and looked away moodily, reaching for his half drained cup of wine and taking another large gulp, draining it and putting the cup back down sharply.
Pythagoras looked at him shrewdly.
“I do not think you would be this upset simply from Hercules’ actions and selfishness,” he observed. “What else has happened this evening?”
Jason glowered darkly but did not answer.
“Jason… please?” Pythagoras said cajolingly. “I merely wish to help.”
“I don’t think you can,” Jason answered shortly, trying hard not to take his temper out on his innocent friend.
“Not if you will not allow me to,” Pythagoras responded reasonably.
He poured Jason another cup of wine.
“Try not to drink this one as quickly,” he admonished with a light smile to show that he was joking. “Otherwise I might begin to mistake you for Hercules.” He nudged Jason with his shoulder.
Jason grunted moodily in response.
The smile slid from Pythagoras’ face.
“What is wrong my friend?” he asked softly, laying a warm hand gently on Jason’s arm.
Jason looked down at Pythagoras’ hand. He sighed.
“After I left Hercules I went to see the Oracle,” he admitted.
Pythagoras smiled encouragingly.
“And did she have answers for you?” he asked.
“Does she ever?” Jason replied bitterly. “She’s so damned cryptic all the time, how is anyone ever meant to know whether she’s actually answered them or not?”
Pythagoras looked at him askance.
“Jason!” he protested. “The Oracle is Poseidon’s representative… His mouthpiece on earth. It is not the place of mortal men to criticise her.”
Jason sighed. In spite of Pythagoras’ rational and logical nature, it was clear that he was a man of his time and that his faith in the Gods and their representatives was unwavering.
“I’m not trying to criticise the Oracle,” Jason tried to assure his friend. “I’m just a bit frustrated with her that’s all. I mean she practically told me to my face that there are things she’s keeping from me… that she’s not telling me the whole truth.”
“I am sure she must have her reasons,” Pythagoras responded carefully.
“She says it’s to protect me.”
Pythagoras frowned.
“Protect you from what?” he asked.
“She won’t tell me,” Jason spat back. Then he sighed. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t snap at you. You’ve been nothing but kind and I don’t mean to be ungrateful.”
“And you are not,” Pythagoras interjected.
“I’ve tried to explain how I feel to her… that I need answers,” Jason murmured, half to himself. “But it’s like talking to a wall. The Oracle told me that my father is dead but she refuses to tell me how or when. She won’t even tell me where he’s buried.”
“I am sorry,” Pythagoras responded comfortingly. “I know how hard that must be for you.”
“All I ever get from her is platitudes about how everything will become clear in time.” The anger and bitterness was clear in Jason’s quiet voice. “She said something about only finding our way when we accept that we’re lost… It was something like that anyway. She tells me that she wishes she could make it easier for me but then acknowledges that she’s not telling me the whole truth. I don’t see how I’m supposed to trust her.”
“Jason,” Pythagoras began.
“And what the hell am I supposed to do until ‘everything becomes clear’?” Jason demanded. “I don’t know my place in this world. She tells me that I was born here; that I was taken from here when I was a baby and that I belong here – but I’ve never felt so lost. She tells me that I’m in Atlantis for a reason but can’t tell me what that reason is.” He closed his eyes. “I don’t feel like I belong here at all,” he admitted quietly.
Pythagoras sighed. He was quiet for a long moment.
“Jason I am going to tell you something and I want you to listen without interrupting,” he said. Once he was sure he had his friend’s full attention he went on. “I told you that I was sixteen when I first came to Atlantis,” he said, “but I did not tell you that I never intended to stay here. I was born on Samos and grew up there. It is not a large settlement and the people there tend to be a little more conservative than they are in the city. I was not proficient at sports and did not enjoy hunting. My love of learning was not something that was considered to be normal or to be supported. If I had been a nobleman’s son my pursuit of education would have been encouraged – although physical prowess is still prized among that class also. As it was my neighbours were hardly accepting of my nature. I was an outcast; always treated with disdain. My mother, fortunately, understood me better than my peers and encouraged me to broaden my horizons by leaving the small town of my birth. Atlantis was simply the first stop along the way in what was supposed to be a long journey. I had intended to travel to Athens where the opportunities for learning are greater and a man is judged on his mental acuity and not simply his physical ability. I had been in Atlantis for just two days when I was robbed of all my belongings. Without money I had no way of continuing my journey and here I have remained ever since.” Pythagoras paused, his eyes lost in memory. “I was angry,” he admitted. “Very angry. I felt as though my dreams had been stolen from me. What could Atlantis have to offer me? I felt as though I did not – could not – belong here. As though I was lost in the dark. Yet I had no option but to stay.”
“So what happened?” Jason asked.
“I found Hercules… and he found me,” Pythagoras answered with a smile. “This is not the future that I once intended for myself; not the path I believed my life would take. But I am happy enough now.”
“If you were offered the chance though… if someone came along tomorrow and gave you the chance to go to Athens and do all the things you’d dreamed of… would you take it?”
“I do not know,” Pythagoras admitted candidly. “Athens still holds its enticements for me… of course it does. The chance to study in such a revered seat of learning; to converse with learned men… it is any scholar’s dream. Yet it would mean that I would have to leave everything I have come to love… my home; my friends,” he flashed a quick look at Jason. “If I truly wanted to go to Athens so badly I would have found a way long ago,” he said softly. “The point I was trying to make though, was that I once felt like an outsider in Atlantis; like I did not belong here. Yet now I would not choose to be anywhere else.” He grasped Jason’s arm and turned to face his friend fully, his blue eyes earnest. “Tell me,” he asked gently. “If you truly believe that you do not belong here why have you made no attempts to find a way to return to your former home? The fact that you arrived here in the first place – and that you were taken from here as a baby – proves that such a journey must be possible. So why have you not sought to make it?”
Jason blinked.
“I don’t know,” he said slowly.
Pythagoras smiled.
“I believe that the Oracle may be right,” he said. “I know that you feel lost right now but I believe that deep down you have already accepted that this is where you belong; this is where you need to be. Whatever road you are destined to travel… wherever your journey through life will take you… you have friends who are willing to travel it with you.”
“I’m not sure it’s as simple as that,” Jason murmured.
“No,” Pythagoras agreed. “Perhaps not… but take it from one who has been where you are now, it will grow easier. Our situations may not have been identical but I believe that they are close enough for a comparison to be made.” He hesitated for a moment before ploughing on. “I have to say that for purely selfish reasons I hope you find your place here,” he added.
Jason frowned.
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“I mean that I do not wish you to leave,” Pythagoras answered. “It is selfish of me I know but in the past few weeks I have come to enjoy your company. It is nice to have someone of my own age to talk to and nice to have a companion on those evenings that Hercules chooses to spend in the tavern. It can be lonely here on my own when Hercules is out drinking. Besides,” he added with his eyes twinkling mischievously, “there is much fun to be had at Hercules’ expense when there is someone to share it with.”
Jason huffed a soft laugh and let his head rest back against the wall, feeling the last of his anger draining away. He toyed with the cup of wine that was still in his hands as he watched Pythagoras go to pour his own second cup. The flagon was empty and the mathematician frowned as he held it upside down, watching the last drops falling from the rim into his cup.
“Wait there,” he said to Jason. “If we are to talk into the night I believe we will need more wine.”
Jason watched him leave with languid eyes, too comfortable to want to move. Idly he wondered what he’d done to deserve a friend like Pythagoras. Suddenly life didn’t seem so bad at all.
Go to Chapter 3